Miami Notes

(Pictured Right: CCCG/Miami City Club's new "Latin Night"?)
1. Miami Overheard: People in Miami seem to be given to regurgitating something someone else said or just not knowing much about anything. I’d like to think that the blogging community in Miami is changing/has changed that. Miami is an outpost city of the American empire, full of sinister intrigue-exciting? At first. Eventually it becomes dull. Crazy isn't necessarily interesting. Miami's oddities and insularity become predictable and even stifling. Again, here comes the blogging community to the rescue. Still, nothing beats live and in person listening to what people are saying.

Forget about the bars, night clubs and the streets, my favorite places to eavesdrop are the Miami City Club or the Country Club of Coral Gables Gable (aka CCCG on the license plates of social climbers). I'm poor and wouldn't waste the money on memebership but my university club has reciprocal relationships. I see the funniest mix of Miamians, the self imagined elite. It’s like being in Calcutta in 1940.

There are the handful of white colonials given to wearisome, boozy complaining about the "natives" (in Miami the natives happen to immigrants). There is the contingency who seem to be entirely unaware of the peculiarities of frontier living, being thoroughly frontier folk. And many people are in some stage of moving away from Miami. Or at least they all say that. The final type that comes to mind are also my favorite, the almost-adapters. They feel an elusive happiness is to be found in adapting to the peculiarities of frontier living but they have not quite arrived there. I'm compiling some of the more interesting comments overheard in all sorts of environments. Not sure what I'm going to do with them.

2. Speaking of boozy Anglos suffering from peer abandonment, Katherine “Kitty Kat” Harris is saying she will spend her estimated $10-15 million inheritance on the FL governor’s race. I have shared with you all why I am voting for Kitty Kat, and it DOES have to do with Kat class and Kat style. I told you why before, she’s a flirty lush and her make-up says “eager to please”. And lately it has been reported that she’s 86’ed the jacket and wore those "pea smuggler" (geddit?)sweaters and blouses to show off the goods. Any of you nauseous yet?

3. I am not that different from the folks that Alesh obviously detests. (Note his energetic and wholly entertaining back and forth with Rick.) Despite or because of my multi-generational Hispanic-ness, I am sure that at some point I actually have said “uhmurcan” (as in our blessed way of life in the U.S.) being screwed up by “furnurs” (those people who don’t share the values and culture that I am most comfortable with). Damn it, recent immigration, (whether due to poverty, disenfranchisement, or just plain damn “foreign-ness”) has assaulted our way of life! They don’t get our values and principles. They don’t assimilate or even try. People are always giving them handouts and their behavior undercuts what has been achieved in our society. Some of them have a sense of entitlement that is unbelievable! *1

4. Local book dodgers, I mean Miami-Dade students and presumably their parents, find that there is another reason to protest besides the FCAT, English immersion and rules against night club outfits in schools. And this time they have a worthy cause- the immigration bill now in the U.S. Senate. Whoo-Hoo!

5. He’s small, he’s furry, and he’s one of the most annoying sidekicks since Scrappy Doo. As the diminutive fuzzball that forever lives in the shadow of his master, Arriola offered little more than a steady stream of wisecracks. And yet, in playing through any of the Mayor Diaz and games, one can’t shake the feeling that having a sidekick that you don’t ever control is a bit of a missed opportunity. Well now, the little critter has gone solo and in Miami, you get to play out all your furry little fantasies.*2

6. I urge you all to contact Bonnie Gross about getting us a new Multicultural Directory. We have very small but growing pockets of every ethnicity imaginable along with the usual Caribbean area folk. This isn't New York or LA (so what) so it is hard to really know anything about them or their cultural offerings without a guide. Bonnie, a really sweet person, has stated to me that she would like to do a new one, but the old one had to be removed because it was outdated. I believe she needs proof that some people actually care before making the investment in personnel time. Contact: Bonnie Gross, Executive Producer, blgross "at" sunsentinel "dot" com , 954-459-2283

7. At the Dade County Commission we have a clown spotting. Or maybe it's a masquerade. Katie “Clueless” Sorenson is bullshit- she doesn’t have a clue on what to do about transportation, education, poverty, substandard housing, economic development, crime, or any goddamn thing. I’ve seen Clueless Katie repeatedly in interviews in print, radio and TV struggle to offer even a coherent answer or worthwhile idea. I’m ashamed to say that it took me this long to figure it out- she is either an idiot or self serving apologist. I listened to her respond to a question about the FEC corridor transit line and she seemed confused, like she had never heard of it!When communities have a problem such as unfair mitigation fee for newly incorporated cities she tells them to go to county manager Burgess. Burgess! Burgess! The ass ferret to developer-loving commissionners Burgess! (My credulity is tested beyond belief!) People have gone against their better instincts again and again and trusted her, only to be given the shaft. She is riding that urban boundary thing a bit too far. I’m ashamed of having supported her. Now that I found magic sparkle dust blown off- Poof! Another Bullshit Artist. Too harsh? Let's give her ONE more chance to redeem herself b/c of the UDB issue.

8. (Katy figures into this one too.) Ever heard Katy Sorenson speak on issues of integrity in public spending or affordable housing? Neither has she? What about hovels that the county is getting fat on by administering? Where was the great reformer on this one? Hell, I’m forced to buy Dade Mayor Carlos “Frankenstein” Alvarez’s wooden, rehearsed “too many excuses, this is unacceptable, who’s mayor around here (no really, who?)” outrage. Give him a dime for each time it’s offered and he’ll be a millionaire.

9. Expect great things from Obdulio Piedra. He is one of the good hearted folk of our city. Ask him to do something helpful with the community and he’s there. He has pushed for integration and affirmative action opportunities (training not "position quotas") in many institutions he's involved in, including Great Bank of Florida. (This is a new thing Miamista is doing, recognizing good folk in his postings.) While I’m mentioning him, Miamista shouts out his son JP- you’re one funny SOB. I saw that crazy baby food eating heifer in NEW YORK. I really need your help with the PR thing I was telling you about. Get back to me. (Miamista will limit himself to one shout out an article.)

10. Kimco, the giant retail property owner that pushed through the Home Depot in the Grove has cut down old mahogany trees and doesn’t even want to pay the mitigation fees (or replant trees it seems). Trees get in the way of the construction starter-site that is the parking lot of all Home Depots. The supplier of mother’s milk to Mayor Dickhead and Winton wants to keep Home Depot happy since it is one of its largest clients. Rather than wait for Home Depot to cut down the trees, Kimco is doing the dirty deed. Contact Winton- Boycott Home Depot- Poe's Hardware people! (Poe's Hardware & Rentals 425 Dixie Hwy. Coral Gables FL 33146 305-667-6413 )

*1-Gotcha! If you agreed with that you are a racist, xenophobic, narrow minded bigot. Or you could be perfectly normal. Can't decide which one.
*2- That piece actually comes from a magazine review of the Jak and Daxter (?) video game written by a buddy. I proofed it for him and suddenly noticed that if you change the names...